Kura - where all the famous people go

We were having dinner at Kura last night for Ben's birthday when I realised that Lucy Lawless was at the next table (I must say looking hot with her blonde hair) and it was her birthday too. She was having dinner with a bunch of no-name NZ celebrities. They sang her Happy Birthday and they all joined in when everyone was singing Happy Birthday to Ben (i hate that song and the singing of it, but don't get me started). So that was nice. She jokingly looked a bit miffed when a cake appeared at our table and leaned over to ask us whether it was good. Anyways, towards the end of our meal Russell Crowe walked in with his bunch of cronies that I assume were his godawful band Ordinary Fear of God(awful). The NZ 'celebrity' table cheered and Ben froze in a paroxism of excitement, mouth agape and eyes lit like it was christmas. I thought he might actually have kittens. Mind you, this is the guy who was previously excited to the point of telling everyone on a Monday morning that Judy Bailey had been into the cafe he moonlights in. He also was excited by Christine Rankin's appearance and thought about taking home a baby bottle that she'd left behind to sell it on the interweb (I know he was joking, because he's so paranoid of dirt, bacteria etc that there's no way he would ever have touched it!). If you have no idea who these people are then I wouldn't be surprised. Given the shit that becomes front page news here anyone can become famous. Okok, so Judy Bailey is reasonably famous in NZ terms, she was the TV1 newsreader for like, forever, but Christine Rankin? Famous for being head of the NZ welfare organisation (winz) and being crap at it and wearing short skirts and big hoopla earrings. So, I guess for him, Russell Crowe and Lucy Lawless are big news! REALLY BIG FUCKING NEWS. He was in the paper this morning with this picture





He was wearing the same jacket at dinner. Does the man never change? OK, I know I'm only kidding. He could have had the interview just before dinner or something. I just thought, if KanYe can change four times in two hours, can't the man put on something different before he goes out to dinner?! (If anyone says the word "interrobang" I swear I'll hurt them.)
Russ thinks that NZ will be "surprised" by his concert. What, surprised at how someone can be so shit? Coz I don't think anyone will be surprised at that...
Australia can have him.

Disclaimer: no-one in the making of this story has taken out a fatwa of any kind on CR